Ignition Coach Spotlight: Matthew Taylor
Today’s coaching spotlight is part of a series where we will feature and celebrate the diverse and talented coaches that work with Ignition around the globe. We hope you enjoy knowing more about the wonderful folks who make our work unique.
Today, we are featuring Executive Coach, Matthew Taylor. Based in Washington, D.C., Matt is a leadership coach with 14 years of experience designing and facilitating professional development grounded in Daniel Goleman’s Emotionally Intelligent Leadership Theory. For a full bio, visit his about page here.
Here’s what Matt shared with us.
What inspired you to become an executive coach?
My work training school leaders led me to executive coaching training. This training helped me realize that the deeper, transformative development work—supporting people to reach their full potential as human beings—is my true calling.
Tell us about your coaching methodology.
Our 5 Square framework effectively operationalizes emotional intelligence, making it accessible to leaders to apply it in their day-to-day work. The model is anchored in core values—why we care and what drives us—because we believe our values are the source of our power as leaders and human beings. Our job as coaches and facilitators is not to teach others how to lead but to surface the power they already have at their core. Becoming self-aware and learning how to manage the stuff that gets in your way unleashes profound personal and professional transformation. The feedback from my clients illustrates this beautifully. For example, in a recent session, a client said, “Self management is powerful and impactful, a game-changer.” Others say recognizing and managing their emotional triggers has been pivotal to their growth.
Do you have a regular meditation or mindfulness practice, and how does it help?
I have a stretching and breathing routine that I follow first thing in the morning and between coaching meetings. It lasts somewhere between 2 and 10 minutes, depending on my time. It’s amazing how this practice can ground me, wake me up, and jump-start new positivity in just a couple of breaths and bends.
What other practices do you have to build your resilience levels?
I am very disciplined about my basic wellness (sleep, diet, exercise). I also stay engaged with colleagues in a professionally and personally fulfilling way.
What are some misconceptions about leadership?
It comes down to what people believe the role of emotions are in leadership. I think we're taught very early on that there's no place for emotion as a leader and that our job is to tamp our emotions down and be strong. However, I learned from Daniel Goleman and the emotional intelligence world that resonant leaders rely on emotions as data. Resonant leaders tune in to the emotional reality in any room or relationship. For them, there are always two conversations going on: the conversation about the work and the unspoken, emotional, sub-current, or elephant in the room. Resonant leaders are aware of what's going on emotionally and use the emotions of others as well as their own emotions to lead.
Related to that misconception is the one that leadership should feel good. Many people think emotional intelligence means everyone should be happy and feel good with each other all the time. Through studying emotional intelligence and coaching leaders, I've learned that there are dissonant emotions that can also be tools for influencing and even inspiring people. Resonant leaders know when to use all different kinds of emotion in their leadership to resonate to meet their goals. The key, of course, is self-management. Great leaders aren't in their emotions; instead, they're using emotions to further their objectives.
“There was an arc to the reaction to hybrid. At first, the sentiment was that it was harder to lead via video conferencing, but once everyone got used to it, they realized it’s still possible to connect.”
Now that we live in more of a hybrid in-person and online working arena, have you noticed a difference in resonant leadership?
Many leaders said it's harder to lead virtually. They're saying it's harder to connect emotionally across a screen. I have found that emotions are contagious across the screen as they are in person. There was an arc to the reaction to hybrid. At first, the sentiment was that it was harder to lead via video conferencing, but once everyone got used to it, they realized it's still possible to connect.
The truth is, even before the pandemic, I coached via Zoom. At first, I thought, oh, boy, this will be tough to connect and read emotions and create safe emotional spaces for coaching, but I found it’s almost as good as being face to face. So organizations who plan on staying virtual or adapting hybrid models long-term should know it is possible to be a solid resonant leader at a distance. It will take more deliberate action to create the space for connection, but it's possible.
“The Emotional Intelligence Leadership workshop with Matt Taylor was pivotal towards increasing trust and accountability, coupled with the experience of “breakthrough moments”
across our leadership team. I highly recommend it.
The session has been a catalyst for healthy, meaningful, deep (and at times uncomfortable) discussions among the leaders of our business unit. The El framework unearthed ways to communicate among leaders that minimizes ambiguity and promotes effective decision making.”
Could you tell us a brief story about a moment you saw the impact of your work?
I love coaching work because of the transformative moment of new self-awareness when a light bulb goes off. It’s the switch when people get below the surface and start to explore what's happening to them in moments when they're emotionally triggered and when we get to a point where they're thinking about the stories they tell themselves or what we call in the business “self-limiting beliefs.” They realize that “Wow, this is the assumption that I've been living by. Here's how it's holding me back. And I don't have to believe this. I can choose whether to believe this or not.”
For example, I was working with a leader who was having difficulty connecting because of feelings of frustration, anger, and impatience with the people they managed. We were digging into a moment where this was happening and getting to the stories they tell themselves. They realized that the stories were overwhelmingly negative and assumed the intent behind their colleague’s actions. They were making the assumption at the beginning that these people can't grow because there's something wrong with them, rather than focusing on the conditions they were creating as a leader.
Through the coaching process, this leader was able to start moving people in ways they thought they never could. Once this person realized that they have a choice about the stories they are telling themselves and that instead, they can tell a noble story (or the best possible story), the emotional nature of their interactions shifted. After that, they could start connecting more with the people they lead and creating conditions for those people to grow.
Where can people read more about your work?
I recently published a book entitled “The Noble School Leader: The Five-Square Approach to Leading Schools with Emotional Intelligence.” It is a practical guide for school leaders and managers seeking concrete strategies for professional improvement
I am also a contributing author for a series of primers within the “Building Blocks of Emotional Intelligence: 12 Leadership Competency Primers” by Dr. Daniel Goleman et al.
You can also find my writings on the Coach Federation blog, such as my article on “The 3 Levels of Awareness in Transformational Coaching”.